The key to negotiating is letting people talk themselves, not talking people into it. Have you ever been on holidays to the tourist spots in Spain? Any shops you walk into you find yourself negotiating with the sales assistant straight away. Sales training facilitators will point out that we have all negotiated at some point in our time whether it is with the children to go bed or with the bar man to give you an extra shot.

Many of us find it difficult to confront a negotiation as we are people pleasers. Yet this does not mean that we can not carry through the negotiation with confidence as we possess the tools and tactics that are used on sales training courses to get us to achieving our goals. Some of the tactics used can include;

1. The wince. “AAAHHH, what in the world?!” this overreaction is carried out when your counterpart gets to their point and states their position. Sales training courses will tell you that if you are not prepared for this you will give in.
2. Silence is golden. Use silence if you do not like what they say or if you are waiting for a response. You need to ride out the uncomfortable silence to accomplish your objectives. The chances are that the counterpart will feel compelled to give in.
3. Trial balloons. These are questions that sales trainers will advise that you use to test the waters.
4. The Red Herring. When someone weasels their way out of the principle point on to a smaller matter. They then get tough on the smaller less important matter. This leads you to feel bound into negotiating down even further.

Sales training courses will tell you that half of your work is actually in trying to define the problem. For this reason throughout a negotiation it is necessary for all participants to discuss their problems and what they are expecting to achieve.

Is being on guard a good tactic to use while negotiating? A sales training course will explain to you that it is not. People that loosen their guard are more approachable and therefore more likely to achieve their goals as they look for the similarities they have with the component.

Through sales training courses you can gain great knowledge and experience from others mistakes and contributions. There are hush-hush tips however that can guide you into not making the same mistakes. These mistakes may include;

o Telling your self it is the end of the world if the deal does not follow through. Put simply it is not.
o Believing your counterpart has all the negotiating power. Keep in mind that we are all equal. If you want the truth and a fair outcome go in to the negotiation with a clean slate and no prejudgements.
o They fail to see that there is more than just one option.
o An approach that it is me against my opponent.
o Accept all positions as final. This is not fact take markets for example, they say final yet if you continue persuasively the majority will lower their price again

Sales skill trainers will always stress to remember that when negotiating you are trying to help each other out rather than working against each other.

“There are two types of speakers. Those who get nervous and those who are liars.”

-Mark Twain

Everyone is afraid of a presentation, physiologically. Toastmasters International reports that the following professionals have admitted to feeling nervous when speaking in public: Mark Twain, Ronald Reagan, Carroll O’Connor, Barbara Streisand, Anthony Quinn, Garrison Keillor, Sally Struthers, George Burns, James Taylor, Liza Minelli, Joan Rivers, and… Mary Sandro. I couldn’t resist adding my name to such a star-studded list!

Many presenters fight their nervousness. They deny it or use it as an excuse for not presenting. The first step to making nervousness our friend is to accept that it is normal. I dare say, the more nervous we are, the better a presenter we can be. The rationale for this seemingly ludicrous claim lies in the physiological understanding of nervousness.

Making a presentation is an opportunity and a challenge. Any time we are faced with a challenge, our bodies produce adrenaline. Psychologists refer to this as the “Fight or Flight” response and there is no way to stop it. It is wired into our genetic makeup and our bodies have been producing adrenaline for thousands of years.

Adrenaline is a fancy word for energy. When we are faced with a challenge, like making a presentation, our bodies produce energy. That almost sounds helpful, doesn’t it? In fact, from this point forward we will never call it nervousness again. We don’t get nervous; we have excess energy! All of those nervous symptoms we experience like dry mouth, shaky knees, hyperventilation, and butterflies are nothing more than excess energy getting the best of us. Now, what if we could take that energy and get the best of it?

Energy is a necessary ingredient for a successful presentation. Nervous presenters have a lot of raw energy available to them, which is why I claim they can become great presenters. This is also why I disagree with the advice most often given to nervous presenters, “Just relax.” This advice is counterproductive and almost physically impossible to execute.

When was the last time you went into a performance or a competition relaxed? Maybe the last time you didn’t perform very well. We need energy. Some call this energy the competitive edge. Some call it inevitable. It’s very difficult to fight thousands of years of evolution. If we think a presentation is a challenge, which it is, our bodies are programmed to produce adrenaline or energy. Instead of trying to fight this natural, helpful phenomenon, why not use it?

The difference between a polished presenter and one who seems to be having a nervous breakdown is not that one is nervous and the other is not. Physiologically they both are producing excess energy. The difference is how they use the energy. Polished presenters use the energy positively. Historically nervous presenters can too.

In general, things exist in pairs, on a pole as opposites. For example, there is hot and cold, light and dark. Things on the same pole can be changed into one another. Light can be changed into dark and hot can be changed into cold, but cold cannot be changed into light. The same is true with emotions.

Emotions exist in pairs, on a pole as opposites. For example, there is happy and sad, love and hate, anxiety and anticipation. Happy and sad are of the same pole and can be changed from one to the other. The same is true with anxiety and anticipation. Nervous presenters allow their energy to manifest as anxiety, while polished presenters channel that energy into anticipation.

The same energy that creates nervousness or anxiety can create anticipation or excitement. There are many strategies for shifting the energy to the higher end of the pole. The most helpful are mental strategies. To keep the energy anticipatory and exciting, focus thoughts on positive aspects of presenting. Visualize only success. Imagine the benefits of presenting and focus on the opportunity rather than the challenge.

Another strategy for shifting the energy is to get in touch with the physical feeling of anxiety in our body. Where is the feeling centered? Is it in the gut, throat, or somewhere else? Once located, move it up one inch higher and notice how the emotion changes. This mental and physical relocation will shift the emotion to the higher, more positive pole of anticipation or excitement. Do this exercise anytime nervousness strikes, even just before the presentation.

To summarize, everyone gets nervous when they present, even the pros. Nervousness is nothing but excess energy that we can use to generate an emotional state of anxiety or anticipation. Be gentle with yourself and make friends with the energy by focusing on the positive aspects of presenting. Know that the energy can propel you to great presentations by giving you the necessary competitive edge.

With the ever growing short sale market in today’s real estate community, it is important to have an incredible short sale negotiator that is part of your team. This person will assist you in handling all of the day to day communications with the lender, the mounds of paperwork, provide constant status updates and will allow you to focus your time on income producing activities. While partnering with a SS negotiator, the type of relationship you forge with the negotiator is so important. We’ve found one important dynamic of a successful transaction is that the SS negotiator and Agent’s relationship should be built on trust. The negotiator and real estate agent must trust that each other is going to do exactly what they say they are going to do- it’s a two way street.

As a short sale administrative company, we suggest the Real Estate Agent permits their entrusted negotiator the ability to “quarterback” the transaction. The negotiator is normally the one that’s in contact with every single person during the entire transaction (lenders, sellers, Title, Escrow, Buyer’s Agent, Buyers lender, and HOA company… just to name a few). Yes, this is a lot to handle, but a good negotiator can easily perform these duties.

Here are 10 tips to ensure a successful relationship:

1) Allow the negotiator to have direct contact with the sellers – This will expedite the request for documentation and also will allow status updates directly.

2) Allow the negotiator to coordinate the HUD-1 with the Escrow Company.

3) Allow the negotiator to work directly with the buyer’s agent.

4) If the agent does receive a call from the lender, immediately refer the call to the negotiator. This will eliminate incorrect information being transmitted to the lender. In the end, it will help the short sale run smoother.

5) Respond to all document requests within the allotted timeline provided by both the lender and the negotiator. Again, this will only help the transaction.

6) Always remember that your short sale negotiator is on YOUR team. Short sales can be frustrating at times, but the negotiator is your teammate and will ensure that you and your seller’s interests are of the utmost importance.

7) Trust that the negotiator will escalate the file when it is needed. Being specialists in the field, they understand lender timelines well and know when a file needs to be pushed a bit harder.

Ensure that all documents are complete, and have all signatures before submitting them to the negotiator.

9) Be patient with the lenders requests for documentation. Short sales require a lot of paperwork. There are times when the lender states that they didn’t receive documentation, the information was not legible, or they recently updated their forms and now they need the new version – most of these are out of the negotiator’s control and the only thing to do is quickly adapt and fulfill the lenders requests.

10) Always keep communication open. If you are frustrated or worried about something, voice it. This way the negotiator and you can build that trustful relationship. The last thing anyone wants is to have a stressful transaction. Clear lines of communication will further assist a great working relationship.

Being a successful short sale negotiation firm, we understand the frustrations behind short sales. We also know the importance of great communication and positive relationships. These factors are often the reasons behind successful transactions.